We%u2019ll come right out and say it: nearly everybody is making toasts the wrong way.

We%u2019re not talking about the speech%u2014that%u2019s another post entirely%u2014but about the climactic moment when everyone raises their arms and sends their glass careening towards the middle, ricocheting from flute to flute like a pinball filled with champagne.

Gentlemen, this is not how it%u2019s done.

Touching glasses is supposed to be about sharing joy, dispensing your blessing across everyone in attendance, so you need to know whose glass you%u2019re clinking up against. That%u2019s why ever since the 17th century, the custom has been to make eye contact at the moment you touch cups. It takes a bit of coordination, since you can%u2019t have your eye on your glass, but it makes the whole ritual feel more intimate.

And if simple etiquette isn%u2019t enough, legend has it that looking away at the moment of contact dooms you to seven years of bad sex.

Which actually explains a lot.

%u2014R.B.